This is a reminder that you can be both grateful and pissed off simultaneously.

I keep hearing people saying how guilty they feel for complaining about Christmas plans being cancelled, when they should be thankful for a roof over their heads and food on the table. Of course there will always be others far less fortunate than you, but that doesn’t mean your feelings aren’t valid.

I am very grateful I get to see my mum for Xmas, and am hugely aware how lucky I am to have my mum around, but I’m gutted not to see my dad, my brother, my elderly grandparents, nor the in-laws. And devastated my son won’t have seen any of his cousins the whole year.

And this goes way beyond Christmas. Gratitude and resentment / frustration / disappointment are not mutually exclusive in any situation…
I am beyond grateful for my son, but desperately sad he is alone, and boy do I find parenting tough. Every single day.
I am grateful to be building our home, but exhausted from the process and furious that the spiralling costs will have a lasting impact on our family life.

I am grateful to have a body that enables me to walk, dance and jump. But I am frustrated by my ongoing back issues which have, this past week, prevented me from completing my own advent challenge. I feel like a failure and a fraud.

I am grateful to have ended 2020 with my business in tact, but hugely resentful that I got zero government support and have had to work my arse off more than ever just to stay afloat.

Just to be clear, this is not a woe is me post because I actually feel pretty lucky, and I know we are all riding these waves. It’s a simple reminder that we are all experiencing hugely conflicted emotions right now, and always. But especially now!

So please, feel those feelings. Have a good shout. Cry into your wine. And then take a deep breath, stretch your legs, and remember all you have to be grateful for too.
Because that’s hugely important.