This photo was taken on 30 June 2012 – my wedding day – just a week after my beloved Grandpa’s 90th birthday.
Last Sunday, in the middle of the bank holiday weekend, he passed away suddenly and unexpectedly at home. At the ripe old age of 91, he had lived a long and happy life and remained healthy and with all his faculties intact to the very end. After the initial shock and sadness, I came to realise that, actually, all of us can only hope to “go” that way: With five loving children living in close proximity, seven grandchildren and a great grandchild, all of whom adored him and of whom he was truly proud.
You might be wondering why I am sharing this on my Blog? After all, aren’t I supposed to be inspiring you all to be fit and healthy?
Indeed I am. And indeed I shall.
You see, on Monday when I received the devastating phone call from my Dad, I was beside myself. I cried, I reflected, I cried some more. One thing that kept playing through my head was this thought:
“I didn’t go round to see Grandpa last time I was in Colchester. Nor the time before that.”
I am lucky (depending on how you look at it!) to have my entire, large family living in one place. I am the anomaly, having moved to Cambridge for university and never returned. In the past three months I have had as many visits back home owing to my brother’s 30th, a cousin’s wedding and my other Grandfather’s 80th. On none of these occasions did I pop round to visit my Grandpa. Not because it didn’t occur to me, but because I felt I was too busy to start “doing the rounds”. Life has been somewhat busy this summer, and the one downside of having your entire family in one place, is that it can be quite time consuming getting round to see everyone, especially when you are already attending a wedding on the other side of the family, or some other big do.
I had made the concious decision on my last three trips back home, not to announce my return, in order to enjoy a bit of down time from my otherwise hectic schedule. I decided that I would go round and see everybody next time. Of course, there will be no “next time” to see Grandpa, and that regret will play on my mind for some time.
So what is the moral of this story, other than the obvious one (to cherish your loved ones, never take them for granted and spend time with them whenever you can)?
The moral is this: There might never be a next time.
It would have been all too easy to write this Blog post saying “Life is too short to worry about what you’re eating and making time for exercise. Live life fully and enjoy yourself.” In fact I whole-heartedly agree with the second part of that statement. You absolutely should live life fully and have as much fun as possible. But in order to make the most of it, and to be capable of giving yourself to others, you have to look after number one first.
If I hadn’t been working so hard recently, perhaps I wouldn’t have perceived visiting my extended family as a chore, and would have realised it is actually one of the most relaxing, valuable ways I could have spent my time. For months now I have been meaning to carve out some more me time, and I have made some progress, but “stuff” kept popping up, as it does.
Think about it. How many times have you told yourself that you’ll start exercising / give up smoking / stop mid-week drinking / (*insert as appropriate) next week? We’ve all done it. It’s so easy to put things off because we’re tired / skint / short on time / (*insert as appropriate). But the longer we wait for next time, the less likely we are to ever get cracking.
You see, in order to break old, bad habits, you have to lay down new, good ones. It’s how we’re wired. This can be applied to everything in life from diet and exercise, to making time for yourself and your loved ones.
Forget about next time. Now is the time. Whatever you have been putting off, do it now and you won’t regret it.